Insight to BeastBoy
by fishy9494
Summary: An insight to BeastBoy's frame of mind after Terra turned to stone.
1. Brave Beast Boy

Who am I?

I'm different. Yet is that so bad?

I'm green, I'm a jokester- quite funny actually, and I'm a hero.  
>So why did the Jokester, stop telling his jokes?<p>

Why did the hero need saving?  
>How did my deep green skin, pale?<p>

Betrayal? Grief? The loss of a friend? Was it her sacrifice? Or maybe it was just the tragedy of it all. The tragedy of my life.

Yet I'll bounce back. I always do; morph to any situation; otherwise it was all in vain. I have to bounce back. For them. For those I lost.


	2. Raven to the Rescue

Raven sat in her room reading, the yellow pages of an aged book, dry against her fingers. One of her favourites, yet today its enchanting Imagery, and its age old storyline seemed lacklustre. Its beauty failed to captivate her.

Raven was a person who did not trust very easily. She viewed it as a vulnerability; a weakness. On this occasion, it was. She trusted Terra, not as much as the others, but she still trusted her. Her Betrayal has made her question all who she trusts, all who are close enough to cause her damage. She can't afford to feel the emotions a betrayal can cause.

Suddenly, raven was hit with a massive wave of intense emotion. Books flew out of the bookshelf almost immediately. A shocked raven concentrated on blocking out the feelings, clearing her head. "Azerath, Metrion, Zinthos. Azerath, Metrion, Zinthos. Azerath, Metrion, Zinthos."

Then, as suddenly as they began, the torrent of emotions stopped, or at least lessoned. If she focussed, she could still feel them. "Beast Boy?" raven exclaimed, pinpointing the source of the sudden shift in intense emotions.

Raven cleared her mind of the worry that seemed to have clouded it. She concentrated. She muttered the words, "Azerath, Metrion, Zinthos," and she was outside the tower, standing on the rocks.

Sitting up ahead was none other than Beast Boy.

...

I heard rocks scatter behind me, as if they were kicked by clumsy feet. A smell wafted up my nostrils, it was the distinctive smell of raven. She must have teleported.

"Hi Rae," I muttered, without turning around, my voice lacking that 'happy' edge to it. "What are you doing here?"

"I'm an Empath, remember?" she said in her usual monotone voice, yet it seemed to be laced with...concern?

She came and sat beside me, quite close. You could tell by her body language that she was out of her comfort zone. "Do you want to talk about it?" she asked.

I knew exactly what she was talking about, and she knew that I knew. Playing dumb just wasn't worth it. "I'd rather forget," I replied rather glumly.

"If only we could do such a thing. To forgo all that pain, all that despair." She replied, her monotone barely recognisable, as if she was speaking from the heart. "As appealing as bottling it all in sounds, sometimes we have to admit our feelings to get over them."

A comfortable silence fell as I gathered my thoughts. 'Maybe I should tell her.'

"I think you've been struggling with these Emotions for a while now, otherwise you would not have recovered so quickly. They won't go away if you leave them bottled up Beast Boy."

"But they were almost gone! The nightmares, the feelings, the thoughts, the memories! It's my fault, and I want to forget! Is that wrong of me? I feel so guilty." Beast Boy explained, clearly getting worked up.

"It's not wrong to want to forget a traumatic experience Beast Boy." Rave soothed.

"I've never been good enough. My parents, I... I couldn't save them! I was on the boat with them going down a river, I was only a child. They told me to fly away... and I did. I watched as they drowned! I should have done something! Anything! I let them die!"

"Beast boy, you were only a child, it's not your fault."

"No you don't understand!" Beast boy exclaimed, taking a moment to calm down. "When I was real little, there was this green monkey. I thought it was funny, so I went up to have a look. It bit me and I got real sick with this disease. I should have died. It hurt, alot. It was incurable; every known case had died before me. But my parents did the Impossible, they used their research and they cured me! And from that I got my powers and my green skin. They did the Impossible for me, so why couldn't I do the Impossible for them?"

"Beast Boy-

"I searched and searched but I couldn't find them."

By this Stage I had tears rolling down my cheek, I was reliving such a painful memory.

Raven on the other hand was a bit of a wreck herself. She tried to Comfort him, she put an arm around his side and let him calm down. This gave her time to try and block this emotional Tsunami, falling all around her, from entering her mind. She was thankful that only the smaller rocks were floating around at the moment. She still had a very loose grip on her powers...

"The Doom Patrol," Beast Boy continued, "I was never good enough for them. I was pushed to my extremes, and it wasn't good enough. It was my second family, and I continually failed. And so I got kicked out with nowhere to go. Mento never liked me anyway."

"Then I came here. My third family, a family of strays and misfits. I finally had a home, I began forgetting, rebuilding myself. Then terra came along and I thought she was special. Weather it was friendship or something more, I don't know, but I cared about her. And guess what? I wasn't good enough for her either. And she turned against me."

I let the tears fall down my face. It was all too much.

"Beast boy..." Raven interrupted my from my own thoughts. I turned to face her.

"Beast Boy, she turned against us. Even after we gave her a chance, after we all gave up, you still believed in her. You still had faith. Now that is a true friend. And guess what; she ended up saving us all. Even though I am having trouble forgiving her for what she did, I can appreciate the ability you showed to stick by a friend when they're in trouble."

Raven looked into Beast Boys eyes before saying "You know what; let me explain to you something about love. When you love someone, you will do anything for them, even if it has a detrimental Impact on yourself." After seeing a quizzical look on my face she explained, "It means you will do anything for them even if doing it is going to negatively impact on you." A smile almost graced her face, but she continued, "Especially as a child. You would do whatever they asked without question, yes? Because you loved and trusted them. You were also constantly looking for their approval. I guarantee you Beast boy seeing you fly away would have made them so happy that they could save you. If anything, they would be worried about leaving you on your own."

"And if," She continued, "Mento can throw you out like that, then, he never really loved you. When you love someone you acknowledge their failures and successes, so beast boy, you are good enough, it wasn't your fault, and terra did not run away from you. She ran away from herself."

Tears were coming down my face again, but for an entirely different reason. "Thankyou" I muttered. "Thank you so much."

Rocks and water were flying all around us. Ravens eyes were closed, she must have been trying to calm herself.

I couldn't help myself; I threw my arms around her and drew her into a hug. I whispered once more "Thank you." Raven, Initially shocked, tentatively began to hug back, that is, until a giant rock encased in black energy, flew over our heads and into the water, drenching us.

Raven quickly said, pulling away, "I need to go meditate."


End file.
